Jo Parfitt's October Monthly Inspirer

The inspiring bit
When you're just not inspired...

Three weeks ago Ian and I took our summer holiday. We joined dear friends for a week sailing in Croatia.  It was our second time there, only a year earlier, just as we’d landed at Dubrovnik airport my phone rang. It was Joshua telling me the terrible news that my father had passed away in his sleep. Of course I would fly straight back to England to be with my mother but, as it took a while to get a flight, I spent two nights on board first. 
   
My memory is sketchy of that time. All I can remember is the pervasive scent of rosemary and collapsing in floods of tears several times a day. According to Ophelia in Shakespeare’s Hamlet, “rosemary’s for remembrance” and the phrase ran in a loop each time I crossed its path.
     
​This year I planned to actually notice Croatia and engage with the experience and so I did. I relaxed into the gentle sway of the boat and watched the sky endlessly as it moved from a buttery sunrise to sunsets streaked with indigo and pink. I tasted every bite of the fresh local seafood and became entranced by the surface of the sea in each of the bays we chose for our berth. I like to focus on the things I hear and see and feel and smell and try to describe what they are like so someone else can imagine it too. Sometimes I use similes, sometimes I just find the right words, so maybe the sea was transparent aquamarine, rippled like fish skin or flat, shiny and thick as an oil slick. I went for a morning swim and focused hard on each of the sounds I could hear, singling them out one by one and naming them: the put put of an outboard motor, the clap of flip flops walking on tarmac, birdsong like a sticky spoke in a bicycle wheel, the squeal and splosh as a young boy leapt from the deck. I was engaged. I was mindful and my mind ran tickertape subtitles as I silently put words to it all. Oh yes, we had a marvellous time. I laughed and I sang and I did not cry. But all the time, at the back of mind, was the thought that I needed to find something inspiring to write about for you this month. And everywhere I turned was that incredible smell of rosemary and whenever it filled my nostrils I was jerked back in time to the previous summer and for a few moments inspiration fled. 
 
It was the last day and we had to be off the boat by 9 am. Bags crowded the deck as we slowly denuded the cabins of all our belongings and the last job was to take the empty bottles and rubbish out to the bins. The task fell to me and the bags bumped against my bare legs as I walked first the gangplank, then the bouncing jetty to the shore. Past the café, the showers and the shop and into the carpark I walked, eventually finding the bins buried halfway down the carpark. There was a huge half-empty silver skip and a range of coloured containers to choose from. But then I heard voices. Three pairs of hands reached through the wire mesh of the fence. I looked up and the whiskery faces of three old women with stringy grey hair called to me. “Here! Here!” they called and their fingers beckoned. They wanted my bags of rubbish. How ridiculous, I thought and moved to look at the signs telling me where to put my plastic, paper and bottles. I pulled the first plastic bottle from my bag and a shriek went up from the one of the fence ladies while the hands waved madly. They wanted my empty bottles! In the end it transpired that they wanted all my recyclable materials and so I gladly passed them through the fence for them to stuff into large sacks as they hollered for the attention of the next customers.
 
As I walked back to the jetty it came to me. In writing, very often, our stories are found not in the obvious places, not in the bright and shiny or blissful moments, but down amongst the grit and the dirt and the sorrow. 
 
I often tell my students that their best writing will be the parts of their text that other people remember the next day. I’ll wager that the parts of this story that will stay with you are not my eulogies and my glossy memories of water and sunsets but of my lingering grief and the whiskery rubbish collectors. ​

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The connecting bit

This month I want to introduce you to Cath Brew of Drawntoastory. I met Cath, who is Australian but lives in the UK, just two years ago when she came to us to talk about publishing her book of cartoons about living overseas, called Living Elsewhere. She was quirky and talented and also, as we soon discovered, creative, versatile and funny. So, when, earlier this year, I needed someone to draw the Life Story Jar for my new writing programme, she was the obvious person to commission. More recently, Jack and I were in the market for a new designer to work for Summertime Publishing and Springtime Books and so we asked Cath if there was any chance she knew how to design and layout books too. She did! And so, last month, Cath was responsible for not only creating all the illustrations for but also the design of Seasons of Wealth by Parminder Bains, a book that lets people use the metaphors to be found in the four seasons to understand and work with their financial landscape.  We are delighted to announced that Cath is now our Senior Designer. 

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​Parting piece

I’ve been busy since May creating and trialling a brand new 12-week programme that helps people to start creating and writing their life stories one piece at a time.  I call it the Life Story Jar programme and the first wave is now complete so I’m moving towards a launch late this year. Don’t let your stories and memories die with you. My programme, divided into modules on various themes such as childhood and friendship, teaches you how to leave an important written legacy. 
 
Want to register your interest now to be sure you don’t miss out? Just drop me an email.

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​What's on in October

WHEN: Friday 25th October, 10:00-12:30 
WHAT: Writers’ Circle
WHERE: Jo’s house, Archipel, The Hague
COST: Free
ENQUIRE: Email Jo

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​Writing me-treats 2020

All my writing holidays can be found, with full details at:

www.writingmetreats.com

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March in Malaysia

WHEN: 16-19 March 2020 on Penang Island and at Tiger Rock, Pangkor Island, Malaysia. 4pm 16 March, Penang – 4pm 19 March, Penang.
WHAT: Immerse yourself in the fascinating heritage of UNESCO World Heritage Site’s George Town for one night and then spend two nights in the exclusive jungle island retreat of Tiger Rock. Perfectly timed to follow the Families in Global Transition conference in Bangkok, 13-15 March.
COST: £750 includes all food, transport and accommodation. Want to go straight to the ferry to Tiger Rock on 17th? Pay £600.
ENQUIRE: Email Jo

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April in Holland
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WHEN: 17-19 April, The Hague, Netherlands. 3pm-7pm 17 April, 9.30am-7pm 18 April, 10am-7pm 19 April.
WHAT: Come be inspired by art and flowers in the delightful city, seat of the Dutch parliament. Visit the stunning Keukenhof Gardens when the bulbs are at their peak and the Mauritshuis, home of The Girl With a Pearl Earring. You will also have a few hours on Sunday 19th to explore at your own pace.
COST: £390 includes excursions, cocktails and canapés. Does not include accommodation or meals.
ENQUIRE: Email Jo

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May in Tuscany, Italy ONLY FOUR PLACES LEFT

WHEN: 9–16 May 2020 – 7 nights
WHAT: How to Write Your Life Stories fully inclusive residential retreat hosted by Bill and Lois Breckon at The Watermill, Posara. This will be my fifth time at the mill. Come and learn how to write about your life in an exquisite setting. Includes 30 hours of lessons.
COST: Approx £1,800 depending on your choice of room
ENQUIRE: More details and how to book on www.watermill.net